Give Me A Break, Will Ya.

I read this and thought, 'Where in the world did common sense fly to?' How easy would it have been for the security guards to simply escort these two brothers to their car and bring back the wheelchairs to the store? As for the Westfield Shopping Center? I think a personal apology and something monetary for the indignity these men had to endure because somebody's crayon isn't too sharp AND the donation to the MDA to round it out. Maybe hitting them in their pocketbook will make them figure out that their security guards need some additional training.

Shroom vs Kitchen Appliances and Mathematics

Appliances and Mathematics, 1.. Shroom, 0:

Last night I was online and testing out a new dessert recipe. I should have stopped, backed up and got the hell out of the kitchen. Am I that aware? Oh hell no. Let's see, what went wrong first? I've made this recipe before, lots of times, but with slightly different ingredients. So, I knew I needed to double up on the cream cheese layer portion. Easy enough, right? Done it in my sleep hundreds of times. Well, maybe last night was the hundred and first and it was a screw up. The first things I did was mix the ingredients for the cream cheese layer and got that laid down, easy, uh-huh, until I forgot the 1 1/4 cup of whipped cream I was suppose to add-too late! Full steam ahead and damn the torpedoes. The next layer was the chocolate pudding. There are two sizes of chocolate pudding & pie mix you can get, the smaller sized one and a larger one. Keep in mind I am using two recipes for this dessert. Basically these recipes are the same with a few alterations. One recipe calls for the use of two smaller boxes of pudding and the other calls for one bigger one. Okay, so this is easy enough to figure out, right? Yeah, usually, unless your name is Shroom and you're experiencing a dumb moment... make that a long dumb moment. Cut to the chase, I ended up using the right amount of ingredients, milk and chocolate pudding, at first, second guessed myself and ended up pouring two more boxes of chocolate pudding mix in. Uh--yeah. That means I have this really thick chocolate pudding in my mixing bowl and not enough milk. My mind does a double take---too late! What to do.. so, I pour in more milk, not enough left to get the exact proportions right, but hey, it tastes okay, just a little thicker and that's not such a bad thing for this dessert.

Now how I did this next trick, I still can't figure out. I know I picked up and moved a dish towel from the counter, the next thing I knew.... it was winding itself around my mixer beaters, the hand mixer was still going in the chocolate pudding, and bogged it down. I couldn't get my fingers back up to flip off the mixer switch because I trying to keep the mixer from eating more of the towel. So, I did the only thing I could do... I yelled for Troll, who was the only one home at the time. Between laughing at me and going, " Sissy, Sissy, Sissy..." and me threatening him to the point that he may never know the joys of fatherhood, we managed to get the mixer shut down. My fingers are knuckle deep in pudding as I try to remove the beaters so he can untangle the dish towel. There is chocolate pudding all over the place including the towel. Then Troll has the bloody nerve to look at me and say, all so innocently, "That's a lot of pudding there!" He got out of my kitchen just barely ahead of my foot.

Needless to say, the dish came out great! I'll probably add it to my website recipes. It's a tad bit rich for me, but if I indulge in a mere sliver of it, I'm okay.
I think someone else is going to have KP duty tonight. I might set the kitchen on fire... again. That's another story for another time....maybe.

Saturday's Beginnings

So yesterday was spent with hubby after he got home. It was nice and cosy until the guys came in from their jobs. Hehehe. Today Mr M is off for another funeral, then a quick home to change before going off to his dinner party. As for me, I'm staying right here, in the Grove, where it's warm and cosy. I have to go out this afternoon and that wind does not say warmth.

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Partner, quit pulling your hair out, will ya? You don't have all that much left as I can tell *hitching skirts and dashing* You've got people to handle that stuff, go concentrate on the other stuff and your writing. Have some fun. IGNORE the people with cell phones..okay...so.. that isn't always wise... but you know what I mean... and 54? *snort* it ain't that BIG of a climb for ya. If I remember right, that's just a step from your alley. I hope for your better half's sake you smell better than Big Foot *grin*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I really have to find out what FBLF stands for... it better be nice.

Err On The Side Of Innocence

I was reading this earlier this morning and I couldn't believe how much trouble this woman went through to get something done. Let's not even mention the wrong info she was given in regards to the car. If this woman hadn't taken so much upon herself, there's no telling what would have happened to these two children. Now hopefully, some judge won't just tap the offenders on the cheek. Sometimes, I begin to wonder what is up with our world. What has become of our priorities in terms of humanity and the world in general?

I know it takes man hours to follow up on something, but when children are involved, shouldn't it be a priority?

**************************

Today is starting out a slow and easy day. I even got up late. There were no funerals or appointments to worry about. I just hope it stays nice and easy.

The weather, like yesterday, is merely a mist now and then. I know it's not going to stay that way. The Sacramento River is still quite swollen, so it's an easy bet that if we get lots of rain in the next 7 days, it'll flood again.

I decided not to attend the dinner party tomorrow. I have graciously gone to a lot of these dinner party things where I have to sit around and make small polite social chatter. I don't like to chatter. I don't like social dinners. So, I think I'm due the opportunity to turn one down. Mr M seems to think that they rather not deal with someone else. I don't want Mr M to get involved in what may turn out to be a 'political' thing. He also says that one of the men (i've met the others) has been wanting to meet Mr M and why, we're not sure. I've told Mr M I have no problem with him going stag, but if he volunteers for one more thing, it's gonna be 'hot lips and a cold shoulder'(inside joke)for a looooooong time.

Hang in there Partner. It's all going to get better. Just gots to ride out the storms is all....

Thursday's Musings

Ahhh, I just knew it was too good to last, the rain has graced us again and it looks like for about a week. I wonder if I should go dig out my life preserver? If nothing else, I'm glad the boat floats. The nice weather has allowed me to get outside and putter around, much to Sprout's disgust. He hates yard work and seeing me do it, makes him feel guilty until he comes out and helps me. It works every time.

Except for the brief visit by Daughter, FB and Topper, I've pretty much had the house to myself today. Mr M left this morning to go collect a coffin, transport it to the Veteran's Cemetary and do the re-interment. Sprout and Troll are working.

10 more pounds and it's time to go buy new clothing. I don't know if I can belt this stuff up much longer. *grin* Sprout got all drama the other day, talking and wailing how his mama is shrinking away. That, young man, I'm not sure what I am going to do about him, well, except love him.

The channel is shaping up, behind the scenes as well. It was nice to go in channel the last few days and simply enjoy rping and using a sense of humor again. There's going to be several new nicks floating around and the characters show promise. We'll see how it goes as days pass. So far, so good.

I haven't had much opportunity to sit down and pen the last couple of times of rp into my next part, but hopefully tomorrow. At least I have enough to finish up the current part I'm working on. I'm not sure where to go from there. This new role I've chosen is a challenge to play. It certainly is going to challenge my creativity. I find myself having to stop and think about various things. My last character was so easy to play, her answers, her actions came as easy as breathing. I like cutting my eye teeth on something new and challenging, that's for sure.

My writing partner has a full plate at the moment, how he juggles everything is beyond me. I can write around him for a bit. He'll jump in when he's ready. Good enough for me.

Mr M and I have been invited to a dinner party this Saturday. I truly do not want to go. I have nothing in common with these folks and frankly, I don't understand why we're being invited. I have this sneaky hunch it has everything to do with Mr M's medals and awards as a Vietnam vet and that sucks. I just haven't figured out how he ties into this little group yet. What do they want him for? if I can gird myself to put up with the little social nice-nice, maybe I'll figure it out. Truthfully, it's not my cup of tea to be rubbing elbows with some of the 'big wigs' of the town. Ah well, I haven't decided yet what I'm going to say to Mr M. We haven't discussed it yet. He may not want to go, but if he does, he may be doing it alone. He volunteers for one more thing and I will staple his tongue to the roof of his mouth.

Rut-Oh!

Dawson and his wife, Jennifer, had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.

"Look!" she said. "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in just a few seconds. Nothing else will do. My birthday is coming up so surprise me!"

Dawson did just that. For her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.

Nobody has seen or heard from him since.

The Carrot, The Egg and The Coffee Bean

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see."

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water,its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however.After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this:

Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level?

How do you handle adversity?

Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

A Wee Bit of Tax Humor

Dear Internal Revenue Service:

Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00 in taxes. Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper, dated 12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.

I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00. Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the "Presidential Election Fund," as noted on my return. You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5" Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws). One screw is enclosed for your convenience.

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.

Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer

Tuesday

Yesterday, it was a 2 1/2 hour down for a fifteen minute appointment and a 2 1/2 hour journey back home. One just has to appreciate the V.A.'s way of doing things *snort*. Ah well, Mr M got the cap for his tooth and that's all that matters. It's still less expensive in spending the gas money for the trip than actually going to a local outside dental facility. In the meantime, the journeys gave me time to think. I didn't care for all the thoughts, but hey, it can't always be a rosy thing. We got home a little after five. Mr M was headed back out to his therapy and I went directly to bed with a hellish headache. Because of my medications, I have to be careful what I take by way of OTC drugs. In this case, pop two tylenols and lie down. I think I remember Mr M bending over me to kiss me before he left. When he got home, I learned he had a bit of a disturbing evening so we sat up and talked about it for a little. I just wish I could have been a bigger help, but the majority of it has to come from him.

Having been gone from The Grove all day, there's a lot of things I need to catch up on. My guess is that it's going to turn out to be more than I have hours for. So I guess it's about time to hit it and start getting it done.

Make it a good day.

*Yawn*

Early to bed, Early to Rise
Makes one...
Well, ready to make another trip to Sacramento.

Well........

I hope that made someone feel better.

How You Measure A Country

In case we find ourselves starting to believe all the anti-American sentiment and negativity about our government and its policies, we should remember England's Prime Minister Tony Blair's words to his own people.

During a recent interview, Prime Minister Tony Blair of Great Britain was asked by one of his parliament members as to why he believes so much in America and does he think America is on the right track?

Blair's reply:

"A simple way to take measure of a country is to look at how many want in... and how many want out."

The Trouble Tree

I hired a plumber to help me restore an old farmhouse, and after he had just finished a rough first day on the job: a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric drill quit and his ancient one ton truck refused to start.

While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands.

When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation. His face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.

Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.

"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, those troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children... So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home and ask God to take care of them. Then in the morning I pick them up again." "Funny thing is," he smiled," when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."

Friday

This afternoon, after Pookie gets out of school, I'm going over there to pick up my babies. I am so looking forward to this. On these days, the rest of my life comes screeching to a halt because those kids get my full attention. Okay and because they just plum wear me out. There's going to come a time when visiting their old grandma is going to play second fiddle. I understand that and I'm fine with it. That's as it should be. Right now, I play an important part in their lives, help them form their values, their outlooks, how they see and treat others. Grandparents are blessed, they have already had their 'baptismal by fire', they've been around a block or two and learned a few things. They don't react to something with as much drama as their parents do. It gives the kids a help with setting the balance in their lives. I can make time for them and make them the center focus of my life even for a day, that's kinda hard to do with parents. I remember those days myself.

Talked to my dad the day before yesterday. Yesterday he had to go get his staples out and he was going to see the cardio doc. I think there was some physical therapy planned too. He sounds good. My step-mother is keeping him on a tight reign. Daddy's only problem is that he hates having to slow down, like having to take a nap or getting winded just going to the bathroom. I scolded him. I told him, "Dad, you just had a heart attack that damn near took you from us! Of course it's going to slow you down and you best behave and have some patience. Mom didn't and I lost her way too young." He called me a cheeky brat. I'm old enough to be entitled, dammit. Always in the back of my mind, since this happened, is that I could lose him at any time. His heart is damaged. I know, this is a fact of life. We lose our parents. Heaven only knows I tell my kids enough. I don't skirt the issue. I am going to die, some day. But it's the losing of that last parent that does something to you. It doesn't matter that he lives in Kansas and I live here. He's my father. Up until a few years ago, he wasn't even my 'Dad'. There had been a very big rift. Always has been since the divorce. Dad made some bad choices and he lost my respect. Sad to say, he still doesn't have it all back, but he's working on it.

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I got those rose bushes cut down. Oh my, am I achy today. It's been about two or three years since I have been able to get outside and actually accomplish anything. I think it was my undiagnosed blood pressure and diabetes. This year I am feeling so healthy it's crazy.

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I have given this a lot of thought lately. I have decided that since role-playing is important to me, I will continue to make comments on how things are going, BUT I will not comment on things I read or hear from elsewhere, that has nothing to do with our channel, no matter how it moves me. It's time to quit looking over my shoulder or letting something tap me on the shoulder.

There's a certain knight in channel that now and then, needs a good thwap up the side of his head. I'm just sorry I didn't find the courage to do it before. Maybe a lot of things could have been avoided, but that follows under coulda, woulda, shoulda and I'm not going there. As much as he drives me nuts sometimes, I never had the heart to completely give up on him. Quit talking with him, dealing with him, anything it took to keep my blood pressure from rising, I was all for. But like a penny, he kept turning up. Whatever it was that was sticking in his craw, sooner or later, he'd turn up with a word or two. I never doubted he cared. He always asked after my family. I just couldn't deal with the drama.

He's asked me for my help and I worried this, like a dog with its favorite bone. I looked at it from all angles, from every emotion I possess, with every consideration for others involved. The cold hard truth is that Camelot is such a part of me, I can't let it go. To lose it is to lose a part of me and I don't like it. So, at some point, with a bit of help from my partner, I jumped aboard. There has been much discussion and talk about guidelines, characters and such. I think we've found a decent balance. Of course, we won't know until it becomes a practicality. That's the only way to find out if something is going to work or it isn't. If not, we go back to the Round Table again. There have been compromises, by everyone. I think we all learned something. Some people have learned to handle their external life and not bring it into channel, some have chosen not to return given the new guidelines.

For me, my greatest joy has been to see my partner writing again. He may not know where he's going with the stuff he's thrown out there but hey, it usually comes together. I'm not always able to follow his line of thought, he's a man, that's normal *snicker*. However we have good communication skills. Whatever it was that inspired him to write again, I am grateful. I just know this feels right and if it feels right, it is right.

And as for that PITA knight, he's a good man. His heart can't be faulted. I may not always agree with how he sees things or handles things. It may take dunking his arse in a horse trough to get through to him...Gods, that sounds like a marvelous idea to remember for the future.... but I gave up on him before, I won't make that mistake again. If I have to hound him, stand up to him, I will. I owe him that much. You see, as much as I hate dealing with conflict, if it matters, if they matter, there is no other choice because the consequences of not doing so means losing a part of your soul and that just hurts too damn much.

What I want is for everyone to get on with it, to quit looking over their shoulders, to stop spewing bitterness and anger. I would like to see people mend some bridges, but I'm realistic, that's not going to happen right now and maybe never. I can hope though, can't I? Either we're going to be able to meet halfway or not at all and believe me when I say that there are some not at all's lying around and that's okay. It just means we know where we stand and we can get on with what we do have to work with and the challenge of rebuilding with what we have currently have.

There's another purpose and another meaning in my life and however it came about, I am ready and I am thankful.

I also owe a thank you to the man, who saw his part in a negative thing and wanted to find a way to make it into a positive thing again, that took courage and a strength of purpose, despite what others might say. You know who you are. Thank you.

Thursday's Beginnings

First thing this morning I had to get Mr M fed and shoved out the door to do a funeral, possibly two. That leaves me with an empty house and boy does the peace and quiet sound good for the moment. Someone heard me, as we have sunshine today. I can hear the birds chirping and singing from the office.

I spent yesterday catching up with my writing. I'm nearly there. I don't think I have enough left over to do a complete page, so I think I'll probably leave off for the moment and work on the stuff I've neglected around the house for today. I also want to get outside and prune those rose bushes I want to move as soon as the rain soaked grounds will permit. I'll just be happy with getting them pruned for the moment. It's hard to remember that I have to wear a hat and sunglasses when I go outside. Now it's not so much of a I should, but I have to. Anyway, I figured I'd savor that second cup of coffee and do my computer morning ritual before getting busy elsewhere.

Yo! Partner, if you're out there, is there a reason why I can't get to your website? Nothing on the server seems to be working, at least it seems that way to me. I hope it's nothing drastic and just at this end... as in... less than techie me. It's killing me not to find out if there are any more parts up to read. If it's my end, drop me a line and let me know, will ya? I'm up to my eyeballs in little things going wrong, I'm starting to get paranoid. *snicker*

For others out there....

1. Get thy hiney to the doctor's again and find out if this is all normal.. shouldn't you have worked through the (pardon me for this) crap by now?

2. Girl! You better slow down, even if you don't know how to. YOU are bucking for a stroke. Women seem to favor those. There are some things that can wait a day or two.

3. Fishing, huh? Tryin' to catch something or just la la la-ing?

4. Helllllllo, are you ever going to update that blog? (this is open ended cuz there's two of ya out there)

5.I'd say Blues suit you for the majority. I'll have to try it, out of curiosity yanno.

Doctor's Report

So I spent about an hour and half in with the eye doctor. I had my eyes go through test after test until I thought I was cross-eyed, then I had them dilated. Once dilated I had evry light known to man look in there, that gave me the queen of all headaches. I even had digital pictures taken of the inside of my eye, now those were some cool pics, weird, but cool.

I have a lesion in my left eye. I was born with it. The retina specialist doesn't think anything is seriously wrong at this point but I may be in the early, very early, stages of macular degeneration. The good news is that this disease seldom leads to total blindness.

Macular degeneration is an eye disease (usually occurs in adults over the age of 60) is when the macula (the part of the eye that controls central, detailed vision) becomes damaged. Central vision becomes limited. However, side vision remains clear. There are two types, "dry" and "wet". The dry version, over time, you may notice wavy edges and distorted lines in your central vision. Colors may look dim. There's no way to restore the vision lost from this. It has to be monitored or it can turn into the 'wet' version. The 'wet' version is less common but more serious. Vision loss is quick and may be severe. YOu may notice dark spots, wavy lines, dim colors in the center of your vision. If it's caught early, laser treatment may help slow the progression of further vision loss.

I have to go back in 6 months for her to check on the lesion and if it is not changing, then I can safely go see her in 2 years unless I notice a change in my vision. I am going to have get a pair of tri-focals to wear. I have 20/20 vision at the moment, altho my left eye is a bit weaker because of the lesion.

I guess, in the worst case scenerio, I lose the central vision in my left eye but, I maintain good sight in my right and I won't totally be blind in the left. It could be worse. There are signs of damage in my eyes from the diabetes and the high blood pressure. I have to keep watch on blood sugars and keep my blood pressure down, exercise and eat plenty of leafy green veggies (ick). Since I'm on track with this stuff, it's no extra chore. I just keep up with what I have been doing.

Like everything else in my life, I am not going to worry trouble until trouble knocks on my door. I have far too much to concentrate on and things to accomplish, places to go and things to see than to sit around and worry my self into what may be's.

Monday's Hodge Podge

Another winter storm is on its way in. Ugh. I hate being a hermit. Although it does allow me the opportunity to write and create a bit more. I also have no excuse to avoid the decluttering either. There's just no end to any of it.

Tomorrow is an early day for me. I have to head down to Sacramento and get my eyes checked out. I'm more or less convinced that it's eye strain that has been plaguing me lately. I have forced myself to wear my glasses more and my eyes haven't been hurting nearly as bad. Let's hope that's all it is.

My writing is finally coming to fruitation. I'm working now on getting the storyline up to par with the roleplay. I have even gotten back into keeping a tablet on my bedside table. LOL. Then I'll have time to go back and putter with the website. I wish I had more time to dedicate to writing, but this house would fall into total demise if I did. I'd probably come out of the office and wonder if the War of the Worlds had hit. I still can't figure it out. I live with three grown men and I am still constantly picking up stuff. I am not enabling them, trust me. I have tried everything to the point that if I want some sort of order around here, I need to accomplish it myself.

Daughter and family are doing okay. I miss the grandbabies, but I'll see them this coming weekend. FB is getting ready to start his long trek to Chico State. FB also has been called to court to supply child support payments for his first child, Shel. It'll be interesting to see how that turns out and how he handles all the demands because the way things stand now, there's no way he can afford to do a long trek to college full time, support his current family and pay child support. He simply refuses to go to work full time and college part time. That would take too long. Oh well, it'll be interesting to watch, like watching a rat work itself through a maze.

On the personal front, I'm feeling a bit unsettled. I'm not sure if I can express it better, maybe, disassociated? Hm. Maybe that's not the word. It's like, I really can't feel anything at times. I'm like, blah. The only time I seem to stir to life is when I'm engrossed in my writing at the time..at other times.. I'm watching my life from afar. Weird. I'm just glad these phases don't last. At the moment what I really would like to do is sink my fingers into the earth and work it. That will just have to wait for a bit longer, I'm afraid.

On the world front:

~~I'm watching with interest to see how the National Security Council is going to handle Iran and how Iran will respond. Iran has to know that US won't threaten and probably can't really, any type of US military move. Diplomacy is what is truly needed here AND if that means sanctions, so be it.

~~I'm glad to see Judge Amin step down. I think he has allowed Saddam to be way too vocal at his trial. Saddam's disrespect is blatant. If a defendant were that vocal in one of our courts he would be warned and if he continued, he removed or maybe, depending on the judge, gagged. I've heard of that happening.

I respect Judge Admin's view that a judge needs to remain calm to maintain his objectivity, but by the same token, he needs to be the one in control of the court at all times and the flagrant disrespect shown by Saddam is unacceptable.

~~ A judge in Georgia gives a man, who admitted to kidnapping and repeatedly raping a ten year old girl, only TWO months in jail because he feels that this type of punishment doesn't work? Get the predator off the streets so little girls can be safe then worry about how to get the man help that will work.

That judge needs to removed from the bench and never be allowed to administer Justice again. What hell of a message does that send to sexual predators out there? And the system that interviewed this predator and said it was unlikely he would repeat the offense? The man raped her over years, YEARS, dammit. Give me a friggin break here. Better yet, give me a damn knife and I'll willingly cut off the offending member myself. Gods, the ignorance of some people and the blindness.

~~Martin Luther King was a man with a dream. He inspired people around the world with a vision and a voice. Does he deserve a day of remembrance? Yes, definitely. Many people move the world in thought and deed, some more than others stand out but every one of them count. The motive of his death showed the ugliness of mankind and stands as a reminder of what we still have to overcome. May his vision, his dream for the world, like so many other great men of our times, never be forgotten.

Short and Sweet, Hopefully

Dad:

Spoke with Dad this morning. He's home. He's glad, my stepmom is glad, I'm glad. Thank you one and all for your good thoughts. Prayers and thoughts do get heard. He's got a long road to recovery but on his way.

Screw Up:

I did a real doozy. My head has not been screwed on tight since before New Year's. I set the oven to clean itself and at 3:30 am Saturday morning, Mr M got up and the hallway was filled with smoke. Come to find out, the oven was cleaning itself all right, *ahem* apparently I forgot to wipe down the bottom of the oven and there was a bigger mess down there than I thought so basically, the oven burned it off for me. Mr. M will promptly refresh the battery in the hall smoke detector. In the meantime Troll and I stayed up about 45 minutes airing out the house before I sent him off to bed and I went back to bed about another 30 after that. I'm beat.

Writing:

I spent the evening finishing up the new look for my web pages on Camelot. It's too dang ...'virgin'... for my liking. I'm sure I'll find time later to fix that..and when I have more time to design. Right now, I just wanted the basics up so I can get busy and get writing and catch up.

Yes! My writing partner has put pen to paper again and it has me smiling from ear to ear. Mr. M looked at me today when we went off to go shopping... I think my grin got wider when I told him. He laughed at me. I stuck my tongue out at him. Needless to say, my brain is whirling, composing the lines I need to to get caught up, not to mention I am wondering where in the heck his mind is at, partner's not hubby's. I think I might have a swirling idea why he went this way, but I've been wrong before. So, I'm flying by the seat of my pants, again and boy, does it feel great.

But for now, I must bow to the demands of my body and get some sleep, after a nice long hot shower, my think tank, don't ya know.

Yeeeee-Haaaaaw

Well, I went to the doctor's and diabetic clinican's this morning. Can you see me glowing? I'm beaming from ear to ear, let me tell you. Everything is great. I was most concerned with my blood labs and everything is in good working order. My blood sugars are down, they're at the high end of the acceptable scale, but I want them down even more. My cholesterol is significantly down as well, but still not where the reccomendation is for diabetics. My doctor gave me the choice of taking medication or not, at least for the next three months. I gave it some thought and decided to opt for the extra help of the medication. I think I'll feel a bit better about it with the help. I can always come off it when I get it down there. I made it through the holidays without gaining weight and even lost some. I'm told it should get easier now, except for Valentine's. Since I'm not one for sweets, I think I'll do okay there. My blood pressure, for the first time, is NORMAL (I'm chair dancing here). So, the deal is, I see the doctor in 3 months for another fasting blood tests (she's got to check my liver because of the Lovastatin I'll be on for the cholesterol) and I see the diabetic clinican in 6 months. She wants to touch bases with me until I become her poster child skinny mini for her clinic. *chuckle* I guess what makes me feel good about everything is the internal changes that I can't see. I see the outer changes in my body and that makes me feel good too, but the internal ones, now that gives me the wiggles!
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I spent my evening last night working a redesign for some of the front pages to the Camelot portion of my web pages. I'm still mucking around but getting there. I'm not happy with them currently so I'll probably put some time in there today.

I also spent part of my late afternoon doing something I hadn't done in a long time, roleplaying, and it felt sooo good! I didn't realize how much I've missed it. End of that story.
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I read something on someone's blog and it made me stop and think, then it made me chuckle and smile. When I first read it, I said to myself (outloud of course) " Am I really opinionated?" It took me a minute to let that filter through and then I said, " Hell yes." It's taken me forty-eight (soon forty-nine and you hush, GQS, I know I'm older than you but not by much) years to get to this point and I'm not disappointed. There's nothing wrong with being opinionated. In fact, more people ought to try it. I'll take opinionated over wishy-washy any day. "Am I outspoken?" again, "Hell yes". I never use to be. For about half of my life I went around avoiding conflict and kept my opinions to myself, anything to keep the waters smooth and I sure wasn't happy. There's a difference between dealing with conflict and dealing with drama. Conflict is a situation that must be faced and drama is how you do it. I'm tolerant of milder forms of drama so long as it doesn't replay itself like a needle stuck in the groove of a 33 rpm record. Sometimes I've found that being outspoken and opinionated creates a conflict with drama. Ah, well, such is life. Life sure as hell would be boring without either of them.

I guess conflict as well as drama is a personal definition of tolerance. At any rate, he made me laugh at myself and I loved it.

Miracles

A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from its hiding place in the closet. She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Three times, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.

Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door.

She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did it!

"And what do you want?" the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice, "I'm talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven't seen in ages," he said without waiting for a reply to his question.

"Well, I want to talk to you about my brother," Tess answered back in the same annoyed tone. "He's really, really sick... and I want to buy a miracle."

"I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist.

"His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?"

"We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry but I can't help you," the pharmacist said, softening a little.

"Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs."


The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He stooped down and asked the little girl, "What kind of a miracle does your brother need?"

" I don't know," Tess replied with her eyes welling up, "I just know he's really sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to use my money."

" How much do you have?" asked the man from Chicago.

"One dollar and eleven cents," Tess answered, barely audibly.

"And it's all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to."

"Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man. "A dollar and eleven cents---the exact price of a miracle for little brothers. "

He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said "Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need."

That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well.

Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place.

"That surgery," her Mom whispered. "was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?"

Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost...one dollar and eleven cents ....plus the faith of a little child..

In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need..

A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law.

Thursday's Thoughts

Hmmm... I'm feeling a bit... disjointed today....isolated perhaps? Not sure. All I do know for sure is that I'm not feeling like me.

I spoke with Dad last night and it was a good conversation but I got this not so good feeling after I got off the phone with him. I am trying to convince myself that it's just me feeling overly anxious. It was something in his voice that tipped me off. I can't quite define it, but almost as if something isn't as alright as we'd like to think. Again, I hope it's just me being worried. I can't dismiss the fact that Dad would hide something from me either. He doesn't want to worry me or put my health at risk. I'll feel much better once he gets back home. Maybe today he says. We'll see.

After that conversation I just couldn't hold a train of thought so I hope those I roleplay with understand and forgive my absense. I need the distraction that roleplay offers from everyday life, but if I can't hold even a modicum of thought, I'm useless. *chuckle* I think I just need a big hug for about a minute or so, a big, strong, knock the breath from my body, hug.

My eyes are still giving me fits today. I'll mention it to my doctor tomorrow morning but not much she can do about it. My eye doctor appointment next week is a good thing. I think my over all stress level is giving my body a not so good reaction. Blech. Not a whole heck of a lot I can do about that, except for weathering it the best I can.

A good friend and I had a wee bit of a conversation a few back and she mentioned that losing weight how her clothes don't fit, especially her pants. Well, now the same dang thing is happening to me. Ever since I had babies, I have had that tummy pooch. Never was lucky enough to have the genetics that would make it go flat again. Well, that tummy has been shrinking and it's the only thing holding up my jeans these days. Mr. M put his hands in my back pockets and if it weren't for that tummy, they would have fallen to my ankles. Ack! I am resolved not to buy any newer jeans until those suckers hit the floor. Mr. M is getting a kick out of that. *snort* He would. Wait until he has to foot the bill for new clothes.

The other day Sprout and I were goofing around. That boy (ok, he's 21 and I still call him a boy) thought he would be cute and start picking on me. Well Mom turned around and gave him what for. I whooped up on that boy. We were laughing so hard I could barely hold my own. At the end, he picked me up off the ground in this sweeping bear hug. I got dizzy for a moment. Dang kids.

Update on Dad

Shortly before I had to get off mirc, I called my dad and had a little chat with him. His blood sugar is up too high, they came in and took an x-ray of his chest this afternoon and the heart doctor hasn't said anything to him yet after reading it. Now they're saying maybe mid-week before he gets to go home. I hope so. I worry the more days he's still in the hospital, grateful they just don't turn him loose, but worried that he's there longer. While talking with him they came in and gave him a shot because of his blood sugar. They're looking after him well. I'm just worried about his tired body. His spirits are high tho.

My eyes are still giving me a bit of trouble so I think as soon as I finish the email I've started, I'm going to call it a night.

Is It The Moon Or Is It Just Whacked?

*blink**blink* I had one helluva crazy dream in the wee hours of this morning and no, I'm not going to relate it. Let's just say I can understand having one certain person in it but the other one... *blink**blink*. The funny thing is, the person I never expected to show up in the dream? I don't even know what she looks like but I sure did put a face to a name. I told ya, weird. This isn't the first weirdness I've dreamt in the past two weeks. I just chalk it up to the moon waxing.

I have been feeling kinda blah lately, combined with sleeping late which usually tells me that my body is trying to come down with something, probably a cold. I'm glad I have a doctor's appointment on Friday. *chuckle* Friday the 13th and also marks the day of my Mom's birth, she would have been 72. It's been 20 years since she passed. Unbelieveable.

I haven't had a word from Dad so I believe he's still in the hospital just waiting to be released. If there had been any bad news, I would have heard by now. I left a message on their cell phone to give me a call. If I don't hear anything, I'll call this afternoon.

I am glad that I have an eye doctor's appointment next week. My eyes are acting up this morning. Obviously, I rather not have glacoma. Hopefully, this is just a bad case of eye strain. But I have to accept that there is a possibility of having glacoma. My mother had it and it's something diabetics need to be on the look out for. So, I think for today, after I'm finished taking care of business, I'm going to go give my eyes a rest, no reading, no writing, until later tonight.

Welcome home, Partner. I'm glad you and your better half had a good time.

~A Quote For The Day~

Life is not holding a good hand; Life is playing a poor hand well.

~ A Danish Proverb

Personal Significance

I had decided to not head for a friend's blog, but he's first on the list and I did so without thinking, you know, fix a cup of decaf, rub my eyes, fire up the computer and my fingers did the walking without thinking. I just had a feeling he was going to answer yesterday's post, that almost goes without saying and I respect that. He has the right to say his piece when something moves him, just as I have or anyone else does. I have come to the conclusion that after this little blurb of mine, I'll also take it elsewhere, when it comes to rp matters. That said, here's my little blurb.

When something has personal significance, you take it with you, no matter where you go or how you go. That's something no one can take away from you and you and only you can decide what will taint that or color it. When something nasty ends up on your tongue, you naturally move to wipe it off and promptly forget about it or, at least, I hope people do. Maybe years down the road, something will make you think of that taste and you wrinkle your nose, make an awful face and think, 'nuh-uh, I'm not going there again'. Okay. Lesson learned.

Every experience leaves its own significance on your consciousness. It's what we do with it after that, that matters. Long after the rest of the world has moved on, we individually need to decide what to do. Do we drag our foot in it? Do we move on? Do we seem to keep going back to it? Or what? From my experiences, I have found that people can't let go of a bad piece of time in their lives because there are still unresolved issues they have. I've done that. At some point I wake up and say, "what are you doing to yourself? And why?" I'm not sure that all my issues have gotten resolutions but I try not to let them ride on my tailcoats.

These people, these situations, whatever it is, that tainted your personal significance, they're in control of it now, not you and that isn't right. When you move on, not look back, you don't give them power anymore. Who colors your significance? You do and the people that you've chosen to let into your world. Why let someone or something have a black crayon and just scribble all over your soul?

When something goes wrong and you make choices, you move on to preserve that personal significance, then do just that because if you look over your shoulder, you're always going to see ghosts. Maybe now your significance is changed, colored in places, tainted in others, but still yours... what you left behind? No significance. Not any more. You've planted what matters to you in every person that means something to you and in every new person you meet. No one has taken your beliefs away from you, no one. What you may feel has been taken away from you is because you allowed them to do so.

Let the ghosts lie. Break those black crayons and be rid of them. Look at what stands before you now... a chance to renew your own significance... a chance to heal and be healed. Certainly that's got to weigh more than looking back at something that can't be changed. Whatever you've believed in, however you've believed it, no one can take that from you unless you allow them to. Do they really deserve such power?

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One of the coolest things I fell in love with writing is that whatever I could be feeling at any given moment and feel like writing down, whomever I may have in mind when I write it, it still all can mean something to someone else, something or someone, I never expected to touch. Sometimes, what I write, someone will interpret it from their own view, sometimes positively and sometimes not. In the end, it really doesn't matter, you know. What matters is the impact, that it impacted a person or people in some (pardon me for this) significant way. That's what matters to me, that it made an impact. People need to feel. Being in a cocoon may be a nice little break from time to time, but it certainly is no place to live life.

People love, people get hurt. People experience joy, people experience sorrow. People come and people go. People break our hearts and people help mend them. People live and people die.

This is Life and it's far too short, far too short, to keep looking back at coulda, woulda, shoulda...

Saturday In The Grove

Well, instead of having to deal with a potential dead battery again, I just took Sprout to work this morning and will do so for the next couple of days. We'll get his car into the shop on Monday. I think it's merely a belt that needs replacing. I got home and climbed back into bed. Brrrr. It is cold and dreary today.

I haven't heard from Dad or my step-mother so I'm going to assume he's still in the hospital but since there is no news forthcoming, I'm sure he's okay, but I'll check to be sure.

Late as it is, I need to get myself into town here shortly to get some errands done. Not sure about having any online time tonight since I am running so late. All it seems I have had time for is emailing. It will have to work until I can muster better.

You know, sometimes I wish I would learn. I wish I would just stop and leave well enough alone. Something inside of me just won't allow it. There was a comment made, which I read, and I felt compelled to write the author and set the record to current, for all the good that did. In the meantime, it just, upset me. Not that that's anyone's fault but my own. I could have made a different choice but I didn't, hardheaded wench that I am. I care about this person. How can I not? But there have been slow changes in their outlook for quite some time now. I don't expect jolliness and gaiety, but dang, why does the record needle seem to be stuck in the same groove? Despite outward appearances. I just dont understand. Why all this looking over a shoulder at things, people, places, that no longer have any significance? Or ...do they? I don't know. They must register someplace...maybe the solution lies in me just skipping the readings... they have a right to put down their thoughts, their feelings, just as I do.. since I find it disturbing, and I have to look out for myself... I just need to take my own advice and scoot on out or just not go there... I hate that though.. keeping tabs on this person is the only link I have with them now. In the end, I just have to decide what is best for me.. my health in all areas that implies... this universe is quite big enough for everyone.. I can scoot around in cyberspace... the kicker here? I kinda figured that their finding out the s's and not s's was not merely pointed at them... it's other places too, just like I said it was.. like they were told it was... I wasn't believed then... and now.. I have to wonder if it makes a dent now... if it matters at all... in the greater picture.. and maybe, just maybe... if I could be right about that.. what else is possible? I'm not keeping score, I'm not.. but it just sorta glares at me, ya know? All I know for sure is that I need to break some sort of circle I'm in... I'll get nowhere unless I do.

E, thank you, Doll. I'll know you'll read this one of these days when you get time in your hectic life. I'm doing my best to keep those numbers down. Eh,I'm not completely successful but they aren't terribly horrible either.

Em, GQS, Spare Misc., Pig Farmer, thank you for your good thoughts, prayers and actions.. they must have made some impact or Dad wouldn't still be with us. I do hold good thoughts for you all in return. Things will work out, they will.

I've got to run. Got things to do.

What's In A Nickname

Ooooo-kay... as some of you are aware, not only do I nickname my household " The Grove" but it's also known as "The Zoo", with good reason. This, in a nutshell, has happened within the last hour. Let me set the stage for you.

For the last two months, I have been playing Russian Roulette with bags of coffee. I switched the household over to decaf back in Nov. however, I still had a bag of caffeinated beans somewhere in the frig. At one time, I had all the bags set in certain places in the frig. Well, Mr M seems to have this habit of rearranging things in the frig every time we go shopping and apparently he rearranged my coffee beans. Hence, the Russian Roulette. Of course, the bags aren't marked either. Well, I think I found the caffeinated one because I had three cups of what I thought was decaf today and I'm too jittery. I know this feeling.

In the meantime, the phone is ringing. It's Sprout. His car battery was dead. I can't get ahold of Troll nor can I get Mr M. *sigh* In the meantime the phone is ringing again (call waiting), it's Daughter. I'll call her back *click* It's Troll... can he please go over, find Sprout and jump his car. Okay... phone rings... it's Mr M... I'm in the middle of explaining the situation... Troll walks in but no Sprout.. sigh again... Tell Mr M.. Mr M's says call Sprout's friend see if Sprout is still there.. okay.. hang up with Mr M call friend's house.. phone rings again (call waiting) it's the neighbor's lad.. did a package get delivered to our house by mistake? Hang on let me go check.. check on porch, no package..call Mr M.. yes, Sprout's at friend's.. Sprout let the car run for a moment or two to charge then shut it off to see if the car would start again..no go.. okay.. call back Mr M on truck cell.. go over, find Sprout, give him a jump and get him back here. Mr M on his way... call Daughter back.. phone rings (call waiting) Mr M asks if Troll is home.. yep... ask Troll to meet us with his jumper cables.. OK. Get Daughter off phone talk to Troll who says he's following them both back home. Off he goes... FINALLY... everyone walks into the house... Sprout's car on the charger... Sprout goes off to shower with the words ringing down the hall... I'm getting a good job and buying a new car.. that way I won't have any more troubles.. so goes the enthusiasm of youth...

In the meantime *twitch* *blink* I am as jittery as a cat on a hot tin roof. Caffeine. I need to get rid of it.

Grace

Oh man... the Lady's Grace has been a mantle for me and we're just into the new year. First Dad has survived his heart attack against all the odds and I was sweating having to deal with jury duty and 3 important doctors' appointments coming up in the next couple of weeks. Well, I just learned that I have been dismissed so I don't come up for jury again for another year. By then, I should have my health issues all under control and for me that's the most important thing.

I spoke with Dad last night. The doctor says if he continues to improve, he'll be able to go home tomorrow or Monday at the latest. Some of the tests are back in and his aorta is enlarged. They also said (if I understood this right) that the normal heart beats downward, but his is beating upward? Maybe that's blood flow he's talking about? Not sure. Either way, the heart specialist is not overly concerned. She feels that with his new medication they should be addressing those problems. He'll also be using a walker and while that doesn't easily set on Dad's shoulders, he admits to the need for it. Like I told him, it will help lessen the stress on his heart and that's something that needs to be addressed for a few months to come.

HEY! We actually got sunshine today. At least, I think that was the sun. We haven't seen it in about 13 straight days so, it's anyone's guess. The Sacramento River has been flooding because they are releasing water from Shasta Dam. If I understood things correctly, there's another storm headed this way, so they have to continue to release water downstream. Well, at least the aquaducts feeding the lower valley and down south should be in no shortage for water this year.

DANG NABIT! It was one helluva a game last night, the Rose Bowl. I wouldn't have missed that one for the world even if USC lost. It's hard to actually predict this, but I think someone (on USC side) screwed up. They should have asked for a replay on one of Texas' touch downs. It was clearly out of bounds, but they didn't and Texas scored a cruical touchdown. USC also lost their focus and got it back too late. Oh well. Great game though.

Quote For The Day

To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.
- Donald A. Adams

Singing The Mid Week Blues

My daaaawwwwgggg left me.... my husband is a piiiiiiita.... my son in law's an asssss... *snort* eh... better stick to my day job, singing or writing the blues is not my forte.

I called for my jury duty info last night and will end up calling again tonight to see if I have to report. If I do, I need to find out from the officials if there is a way to get out of this rotation or if that will be necessary because of my doctors' appointments in the next couple of weeks. I have no problem with doing my civic duty, serving a s juror. I just need to make sure I can do my appointments this time around. So, we'll see later tonight.

I didn't get to talk to Dad last night, too many things to do, but I'm calling him today just to check in with him. I hope its good news. As each passes and he continues to stabilize, the more I relax.

Great game last night. It was the FedEx Orange Bowl, Penn St vs. Florida St. University. They went into triple overtime. Great game. I rooted for Penn. State. Tonight is the Rose Bowl. Hooah. I'm rooting for USC and Troll for Texas, just because he wants to be an ass. *grin* There'll be some noise makin' and some BS talkin' in this house tonight. I can't wait!

Health wise, I just had my fasting blood test done this morning so next week we'll see how things stand. Hopefully, everything is cool and right where it should be. I don't diet. I hate that word and it's a trap. My mind set is that it's a life change. I look at food differently and how I put it in my body. All that still continues to do well. Still losing weight. Paying attention to the total carb intake, with a sideline awareness of calories and sodium intake is working out well. The one thing I didn't enjoy was measuring everything, but it is a necessity. I couldn't believe the difference in portion sizes. There was one time when I thought, " I can't believe you want me to eat only that much? That's not enough to keep a bird alive." But you know, if you stick with it, it works. I eat about every two hours, not full meals, but 3 main ones, and a 2 snacks in between. There should be another snack before bed, but I just can't handle one more. The one mid morning and mid afternoon works just fine. If I want dessert, fine. I just eat it right after dinner because when I do that, a mere sliver of something is plenty. I don't feel like I am being denied anything. In fact, I have to set a timer to remind me to have that little snack mid morning and mid afternoon. The biggest factor is my exercise on the stationery bike. Gods, there are days when I don't want to do it, but I truly have no choice. I need that exercise to help my body utilize my own insulin better. When I push up the tension bar, I start slow, 15 minutes a set and I do two sets a day. Later, I am able to do one 30 minute set and then I work for 2 30 minute sets. My main goal is 1 hour a day. The heart association is saying that is the maximum benefit for your health. I exercise 7 days a week and now and then I skip a day or two, but that's the exception not the rule. I do it not because I want to look good.. I do it because my body needs it, to become healthy. My genetic legacy isn't too good in some areas. After a while my mind set went from "That's what I get to eat?" to "I have to eat again?" Now that's altogether too weird. My diabetes doesn't control me, I control it.

Ya know... I think I make a mighty fine Domme *snicker*

ARUUUUUUUUGH!

I don't know how it works for anyone else, but usually, for me, if something is going to go wrong, it happens in threes and I just got the last two all within an hour. My keyboard up and died and my truck needed front brakes....yesterday. So, both things were handled all within the same hour. Mr. M had a keyboard he wasn't using and another one stashed away. I took the dusty gritty one and the truck is being fitted for new shows as I write this... of course I could have done without the $371.00 tab but what the hey. That's what saving are for, right? So, that's it.. that's three. Now the Universe can go off and mess with someone else's head for awhile.

Speaking of messing with heads.... my mother's #2 son, the one that told me to go screw myself (only not that nicely)? Has been sending me emails again... that sappy pass it along stuff. Stuff I asked him before NOT to send me before he told me to go pleasure myself. So, I wrote him AGAIN and asked him what part of do not write me doesn't he understand? Especially after he said to me what he did. I don't take that from anyone. I also took the opportunity to tell him that I didn't call him about Dad because if he remembered right, he told me that MY DAD was dead to him and if I had called him (which was a damn far reach)I would have gone off on him and told him just how close he was to having it become a reality. I hope he got the message. The man needs to be on medication...

Well, that other predicted storm has hit. So, it's raining again. I keep hoping we get a break as I am getting a bad case of cabin fever. Even just one afternoon of non rain where I can get outside and breath the fresh air for a bit and do a little clean up would be nice.

I'm hoping to be able to do some restructuring of my website soon and maybe a bit more writing. My DT story needs catching up. I'm still debating on where I want to head with that. I need to jump into my reference books about Scotland. I also have a stry to write for Double Moon... one a year.. and if I get one done now, I can sort of skate the rest of the year *grin*

New Year's Monday

The day is still one of those dreary, cloudy, cold and wet days. It isn't raining at the moment, but I do believe it is still in our forecast. The day will be spent paying bills, watching college football, writing and undecorating the livingroom. I'd like to set about redesigning my website for 2006 or at least, parts of it, to make it more efficent. Nothing that is urgent and that's good because I am not at all in an urgent mood.

I didn't really get to talk to Dad today, his physical therapist was there and it looks like he's going down for x-rays today too. But his voice sounded pretty darn good to these ears today and I'll check up later with him and get the scoop.

I haven't checked my blood pressure yet, but my blood sugar is back down where it needs to be so I must be feeling a bit easier. I'm still catching up on my sleep. I slept through most of the Rose Parade today, darn it. I think Troll and I are going to take bets on the Rose Bowl which plays on Wednesday. I get USC. They're one of my favorite teams. My other favorite is Notre Dame. I believe they're playing in one of those bowl games too this year. I find it ridiculous how many bowl games there actually are every year. Good grief, can we say, over kill? Sheesh.

For today, it's nice and easy because tomorrow, the rest of the world intrudes. Sometimes, three day weekends are the pits.

And On We Go!

So, welcome to 2006. The possibilities are endless. I think old business just drags us under and holds us hostage to the possibilities. It certainly blinds us. So, what to do with the old news, the old crapola? Beats me. I wish there was an easy solution.

I got to talk to Dad today. They kicked him out of ICU and into a room. It was good to hear his voice even if it was frail. For awhile there, the percentages were saying I'd never hear that voice again. Well, I guess the human spirit can never be underestimated. I sort of feel bad though. Dad and I were talking and I mentioned his blockage and his shunt and he didn't have a clue! RUT-OH. Apparently neither my step-mother or the doctors mentioned to him what had transpired. After I got off the phone with him and called Daughter to let her know I talked to Dad, I called my step-mother's cell phone and got the voice mail. I left a message for her apologizing for yapping my brains out, dammit. I should have asked her earlier what Daddy knew and didn't know. DUH... dumb, dumb, dumb. But dang it, I'm a Wiseman and that means we want to know. It drives us insane not to know what happened exactly. I know why they did it, especially my step-mother. She didn't want to worry him, I can't say I blame her. I just wish I had had the foresight to ask her.So, all I can do at this point is pray that Dad's alright with this news. I know he's thankful he's alive. We all are. He's 72 years old but I'm just not ready for him to go yet. I'll call tomorrow and see how he is. I want to save on their cellphone bill. She's called me a lot since he went in. Now, the least I can do is share the phone bill with her.

My ex called today to speak with Sprout, but Sprout was still at work. For the first time since our divorce we were able to have a conversation in which he didn't grate on my nerves. We caught up on family news on both sides and we had a good chuckle about people who build their homes or live next to the river.

We have flooding here in the Sacramento Valley. We're talking high water to match New Orleans in some places and on the news last night, I marveled at the baffled looks on people's faces. I mean, the Sacramento River always rises when we get a lot of rain, hello. Luckily for me, my granddad always had a philosophy, never build near the 'creek' and always on high land. On the 'back 40' we have a creek, but I live on a hill and guess what? I don't have to worry about flooding. I don't even have to worry should Shasta Dam break, I'm out of the path of flood waters. The only thing I'm grousing about is that my four legged fur balls are dragging in muddy paw prints. Apparently after this last storm passes through, we should get a reprieve for a bit, enough to let the water soak in or run off.

Well, there's still some hurdles looming up in 2006 and I'm not all that confident that we're going to clear them exactly, but with a little Divine Grace on our side, we'll weather them ok. I don't have any New Year's Resolutions, never make them. I do make a list of things I'd like to accomplish this year. I'll put that list somewhere and as I get time, I'll pull it out and see what's on there that I can accomplish for the moment. Other than that, I just simply take each day as it comes and deal with it then.

Like everything else in this Life, we can't change the past, but we can do something about the here and now. It's not about how you messed up, it's all about how you recover.